Seven years have passed since Sting last played Bangkok, and when the New Wave icon took to the stage last night at Impact Arena it became immediately clear why: At 8:50PM the stadium had filled to only two-thirds of capacity for a show that was supposed to launch at 8:30PM. As Sting started in on his opener (“Faith”), concertgoers shuffled back and forth on beer runs, or bent themselves around the glow of smart phones.
It’s not that those in attendance weren’t happy to see him, or that the shockingly well-preserved performer didn’t give it his all; it’s that apparently, in Bangkok, in 2012, Sting just isn’t that big of a deal.
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This tour bore the tagline “Back to Bass,” which meant that Sting employed a careworn, Fender Jazz Bass throughout the performance, and that he utilized that instrument to rattle off a consistent stream of hits.
“Demolition Man,” “Desert Rose,” “Fields of Gold,” “Englishman in New York”—even “Roxanne” made an appearance.
The five members of Sting’s backing band acquitted themselves like the seasoned session players they most likely were. To my great surprise, Sting kept up with them through the entirety. Whatever tantric chicanery he’s using to maintain his vocal cords deserves, at the very least, second billing.
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A note must be made regarding Sting’s defiance of age and how it is both impressive and infuriating. Despite having spent six decades on this earth, the former Police frontman enjoys network TV levels of physical fitness. He’s suffering from hair loss, but he has met this genetic inevitability halfway and at present sports a hairstyle halfway between a topknot and a fin.
There are reasons for this youthful vigor, and they’re all obnoxious. Sting practices yoga. Sting eats a macrobiotic diet. Sting owns a small mansion in the Caribbean, for which he can most likely credit his luminescent tan.
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The smugness with which he has peddled both his lifestyle choices and humanitarian efforts puts him in a rare echelon of celebrity odiousness. In fact, only one man eclipses Sting in this department, and that man is Bono, whose piquant unlike-ability has kept pace with his relative fame.
From a distance, it’s very easy to turn one’s nose up at Sting. Even in person, he gives off a vibe not dissimilar to one of those yoga instructors who speaks in perfect seriousness about “energy fields” and is probably fucking someone’s mom.
However, as he proved on Wednesday night, he’s also charming. Incredibly charming. Charming to the point where he can saunter into a two-thirds full arena, expend his entire Thai vocabulary within the concert’s opening seconds and still have the audience eating out of his hand for the remainder of the evening.
Seeing Sting live in Bangkok helps clear up many of the most glaring questions—What was the ratio of Thai to farang? (50/50) Was it crazy? (No.) Did he play “Message in a Bottle”? (Yes.)—but the night’s true takeaway was the knowledge that Sting, despite having passed his prime and released some unforgivable albums along the way, is doing just fine.
Correction: An earlier version of this story incorrectly named the songs “If I Ever Lose My Faith in You” and “Message in a Bottle.” We apologize profusely.
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