‘Twas the end of December and we stared at our screen,
Reliving the highs and lows of 2013.
The good, the bad, the “what?”, the “why?”;
The stories we’ll remember from the year gone by.
The folks who look to nostalgia in search of heaven,
Got an unwelcome journey back to ’97.
The haze returned and we feared for our lives,
We emptied the stockpile of N95s.
But through memes and macros, we survived the distress;
No Instagram filters needed to impress.
There was simply no way to be quiet,
About a generation’s first riot.
A maligned population expressing their rage,
The Home Team standing firm on an unfamiliar stage.
Xenophobes and racists were quick to fall,
These men built our city, after all.
Politicians were kept busy, as they are most years,
A rogue barn owl was the least of their fears.
Another co-driver arrived from Punggol East,
An extramarital scandal turned into a Hammer feast.
While our venerable ex-MM hit the big nine-O,
Selfies were big with the PM and co.
MP Baey had nasi padang at a special rate,
The social media star taking it all in his gait.
Anonymous hackers were swiftly thwarted,
At least according to what was reported.
The MDA told news sites they were free to share,
As long as they had $50,000 to spare.
Our courts were backed up with a scandal or three,
As the watching hyenas salivated with glee.
Sex-for-grades, sex-for-contracts, CPIB,
And City Harvest with their bewitching Ms. Wee.
The death penalty relaxed, if only just slightly,
M. Ravi soldiering on, daily and nightly.
Again, public transport was often reviled,
With delays, a fire and an escalator gone wild.
But still they want their fares to rise,
No worries about swordsmen and spit in your eyes.
And while the digging around the island goes on,
Beware of sinkholes as they randomly spawn.
For our world-class queuers, oh what a season,
Even if no normal person could see their reason.
Hello Kitty, Minions and Krispy Kreme,
Who needs sleep when you’re this extreme?
Purple Light left the valley for a tasteless line,
As AWARE missed out on a chance to shine.
We need education and perspectives new,
Not so much, “Hey, it’s us versus you!”
One by one, more green spaces departed,
As work for the 6.9 million started.
The dead of Bukit Brown deprived of their rest,
To haunt new condos in their burial best.
But for all the complaints, there were moments of gold,
The sweet satisfaction of stories now told.
Ilo Ilo claimed glory and we basked in the glow,
Recognition for domestic workers began to grow.
MediaCorp celebrated 50 years of TV,
And we remembered their series from the last century.
ShiGGa Shay hit the charts with a dialect bang,
Rappin’ bout yo dad ain’t nothing but a thang.
Cross the Causeway, we reigned supreme,
Our LionsXII, the new Dream Team.
The Kallang Roar reignited with a blast from the past,
And the King, Fandi Ahmad, back home at last.
So we wish you all holiday joy,
With shiny new coins to quickly deploy.
Savour the moments, but keep it clean,
And we’ll see you all in 2014.
