Hey, not to sound racist, but are you a generic-looking “Southeast Asian?” Not a Regular Asian, but the darker kind, maybe with the curlier hair?
You know, the kind that would look at home in an opium-gambling den? Not the good student/computer whiz/Dragon mom-type Asian, but the one always ready to ambush passing noble crusaders with a lead pipe/switchblade/martial arts? How do you feel about beating defenseless women, or better yet, playing a defenseless woman about to get beat?
Well if any of that describes you, SOUTHEAST ASIAN, then America needs you! CAPTAIN America, specifically!
Walt Disney and Marvel studios have put out a casting call for “Southeast Asians” 21 to 75 from Thailand, Singapore, Indonesia, Malaysia, Cambodia, Philippines and Vietnam to appear in “Captain America: Civil War.”
A model Southeast Asian man from 2008’s “Tropic Thunder”
We suppose Hollywood should be applauded for actually seeking Southeast Asians to play the roles of Southeast Asians, whatever they may be.
All you’ve gotta do is e-mail your details to the casting company, including photos, biographical information and contact details with a subject line reading “SOUTHEAST ASIAN.”
It won’t hurt your chances in Hollywood if you can play up some of that “ethnic” charm, according to one particularly cringe-worthy detail:
“If you have photos of you in ethnic wardrobe, please include one in addition,” the announcement encouraged.
And ladies? Please indicate your bra and cup size, thanks.
The biggest catch? The production is in Atlanta, Georgia, so you’ll need valid work documents for the United States before then.
James Bond’s loyal Thai police officer buddy Lt. Hip in “The Man with the Golden Gun” was played by Korean actor Soon-Tek Oh
Otherwise information for the role(s) is scant. Could it be a loyal assistant who sacrifices his life at a critical moment, inspiring White Anglo-Saxon Protagonist’s ability to win against all the odds? Or a sweet lady soul that herself is “damaged goods,” just like our brooding hero?
“Co Boa” in Rambo: First Blood Part II was played by Julie Nickson
Maybe we’re being unfair, but with Hollywood’s track record? Probably not. Let’s help them out before they just put fake teeth in some white dude.
Andy Rooney as Mr. Yunioshi in “Breakfast at Tiffany’s”
