Bird up, my dudes. Summer arriveth soon (not that it matters to us equatorial residents) and you know what that means — artistes going on worldwide tours for the mid-year season, with many dropping by Singapore in the next couple of months.
Me, I can’t pull myself together to dedicate full articles for each of the many, many live music events that’ll be happening in Singapore soon. And since I’m also the office’s designated music curator (self-proclaimed), I’ve assigned myself to educate all y’all about the gigs that should be on your radar. Feel free to randomly drop the names of these events in passing conversations — trust me, it’ll make you look “Hip”, “Cool”, “In The Know”, and to a certain extent, “Poncey”.
So! Check out the extensive list below, and ping us if we’ve missed out any major concerts we might not be aware of.
The fin. (March 30)
Who are they: No, it’s not a new dope term for the fintech industry. The fin. is an indie rock outfit out of Kobe, Japan — one that’s absorbed all the English-ness of the UK during their time in London. Don’t expect their songs to sound like the typical anime-theme-song J-rock; these dudes are full-on synthpop lads.
Go if you are: Into chill music and want to dance a little (but not too much; you’ll faint from all the intense frolicking) by shuffling your feet and bopping your head ever so slightly.
Coldplay (March 31 & Apr 1)
Who are they: Do I really need to explain who Coldplay is? Alt rock Brit band who once were actually legit good until they sold their souls to the music industry and churned out pop anthems for basics (post-Vida La Vida).
Go if you: Already bought tickets — the show is sold out. You still could go if you wanted, but you’ll be getting shitty seats.
Singjazz 2017 (March 31 – Apr 2)
What is it: A festival for older alt people who have really Mature Music Tastes. It stars Esperanza Spalding, Corinne Bailey Rae, Chaka Khan, Nik West, Gilles Peterson… oh wait, you’re asleep? Ok.
Go if you are: Super into red wine, lounges, intense chord changes and wish that you were alive during Miles Davis’ golden years.
Santana (Apr 4)
Who is he: Oh come on, you know who the dude is. Aside from being a legit guitar God in living flesh who made Latin fusion rock cool again (in the ’00s at least), Carlos Santana is practically a meme now.
Go if you: Would rather be listening to the Grammy award-winning 1999 hit ‘Smooth’ by Santana featuring Rob Thomas of Matchbox Twenty.
Colbie Caillat (CANCELLED)
Who is she: To be honest, I didn’t even know she was still around making music. If her name sounds familiar, she was really popular at one time for singing that sappy overplayed song with Jason Mraz, and also for some other radio hits. I also just learned that her career kicked off because of MySpace. Ha, MySpace… wonder what happened to it. Oh, wait.
Go if you are: Really white.
UPDATE: “Due to unforeseen circumstances, all parties involved regret to inform the public that Colbie Caillat will not be able to perform in Singapore. More information will follow. All hope Colbie may be able to return at a later date for her fans.”
CITY65 Music Festival 2017 (Apr 15)
What is it: A small-scale music festival featuring small-scale acts from the local music scene. If the likes of Babushka, Sam Driscoll, Dru Chen, Stopgap and more aren’t enough to pull you in, at least drop by to enjoy the lush urban-forest vibe of Tin Hill Social Kitchen & Bar.
Go if you: #SupportLocal, bro.
Cloud Nothings (Apr 18)
Who are they: Cloud Nothings is the go-to band when you think of noisy, lo-fi pop. Pessimistic, nihilistic, turbulent indie rock, with a generous helping of catchy guitar-fueled hooks and gritty yelps. To be honest, I haven’t caught up with their new material, but 2012’s Attack on Memory is a proper banger.
Go if you are: A college-educated youth who’s into intellectual things like philosophy and literature but also has an ironic, gritty, DGAF side.
Bondax (Apr 29)
Who are they: A pretty young English electronic music duo who got massive airplay on BBC Radio. They make sexy club bangers.
Go if you are: Tired of listening to Disclosure but want to party up with something that sounds kinda like them.
Megadeth (May 2)
Who are they: Oh, no one — just one of the biggest thrash metal acts in the world. Just one of the Big Four legends who’re ranked alongside Metallica, Anthrax and Slayer. If you have no idea what I’m talking about, you’re not Megadeth’s target audience.
Go if you are: A self-respectable metalhead.
TTNG / Mylets (May 5)
Who are they: TTNG is a math rock band out of Oxford, UK, while Mylets is a one-man math rock wunderkind. The odd time signatures and angular melodies are the kinda math rock we’re talking about, not songs that teach you about equations and shit. 4/4 is for noobs.
Go if you are: A cool yet introverted music nerd.
YELLE (May 12)
Who are they: A French electropop group who are actually really fun to watch live. Like what you’d expect of a French band, they’re all about being quirky and chic — plus they’re playing at the National Museum, so that should be extra cool.
Go if you are: A French expat living in Singapore, or a Francophile at least.
Crystal Castles (May 23)
Who are they: It’s only been a couple of months since we last saw them at Neon Lights, but man their set was fuckin’ LIT, bruh. Aggressive, relentless and a furious force of chaos, the electronic duo is probably your best introduction to sweet rave parties.
Go if you are: Immune to intense strobing lights. Please don’t go if you’re afraid of loud rave music and getting epileptic seizures.
Pitbull (CANCELLED)
Who is he: Miami rapper popular back in the late ’00s, who’s still going strong with songs exploring highbrow topics such as partying, clubbing, dancing, the word “Dale”, and being ‘Mr. 305’ or ‘Mr. Worldwide’. Today, Pitbull’s tunes are really popular among the Zumba fitness circuit.
Go if you are: Nostalgic for the period of time when clubs and bars couldn’t stop playing “I Know You Want Me”.
Update: “It is with great regret that Pitbull will not be able to perform the Climate Change Tour in Asia due to scheduling conflicts,” says concert promoters Live Nation Lushington. Or, you know, there’s just not much interest in catching Mr. 305, because it’s not 2007.
AIR (May 27)
Who are they: An iconic electronica duo out of France who’ve made a career out of composing atmospheric synth music fit for film soundtracks, interpretative dance and for times when you’re hella stoned.
Go if you are: The exact opposite of Pitbull’s target audience.
Sting (May 28)
Who is he: With sweet, sweet bass riffs coursing through his body, Sting has the power of making any man feel insecure about his own sexuality. After leaving his similarly acclaimed band The Police at the peak of their popularity, Sting became a one man jazz/pop/world music tour de force and also your mum’s secret crush.
Go if you: Unabashedly listen to Adult Contemporary.
Hats Off to Led Zeppelin (June 2)
Who are they: Not Led Zeppelin, that’s for sure. They’re UK’s top Led Zeppelin cover band, and a big enough tribute band to be officially endorsed by Marshall amps.
Go if you: Really just want to rock out to Led Zeppelin tunes accurately played live, and don’t care about who’s playing them on stage.
Ultra Singapore (June 10 and 11)
What is it: An electronic dance music fest featuring the world’s hottest DJs in the world of house and techno. Waiting for the bass to drop is a norm at these things.
Go if you are: One of those who goes, “OH MY GOD THIS IS MY SONG!” at every single song.
The Maine (June 23)
Who are they: Like having wedding cake for breakfast, The Maine is an unabashedly sugary pop-punk outfit who’ve been making young ‘uns bop and hop to their hooks for 10 years now. Hey man, kids love pop-punk, what can we say.
Go if you: Want to be punk, but without all the political ideals, distorted guitars and rough moshing.
Britney Spears (June 30)
Who is she: Come now, child — it’s Britney, bitch. Popular pop princess of the 2000s who buckled under the weight of fame and essentially went cray cray. But now she’s back to reclaim her fame, and this’ll be her first time in Singapore, so time to relive those teen dreams.
Go if you are: Not a girl, not yet a woman~
Banks (Jul 11)
Who is she: One of the more prominent members of the whole Alternative R&B movement (aka PBR&B), so you know things can get real Dark and Gloomy, even if it is accompanied by sexy beats.
Go if you: Just realised that Aaliyah is really, really good.
The XX / Sampha (July 25)
Who are they: The hipster indie-electronic buzzband of 2009 who’ve amazingly kept their whole vulnerable, moody, goth shtick going for a long time. Also, they’re a gateway to hipster pursuits. Sampha, South London’s gift to the world, just released a breathtaking debut album after years of improving the works of folks such as Solange, Drake and Kanye West.
Go if you: Want to enjoy a chill night among legions of scene kids.
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