Valentine’s Day can be such a confusing time. Do we buy another unimaginative box of chocolates or make a book of “hug coupons” to protest the holiday as a commercial ploy? (No offense, everyone named Ploy.) Do people still go on Tinder dates on Feb. 14? Is it creepy to watch Fifty Shades Darker alone in the cinema? So many important questions, so few answers.
Luckily, we’re here to provide some. When every gift seems cliché and you just don’t want to exchange plain old chocolates for one more year, may we please introduce the epically epic, Epic Stuff.
This new Bangkok-based website is chock full of cool shit just waiting to be delivered to your door (in a mere 3 hours, potentially!). From beard bibs to the secret behind Brazilian butts, these are our unusual, but totally gift-worthy, Valentine’s Day picks.
They say money can’t buy love. Wrong! They say you can’t bottle love. Wrong again! This glass bottle contains Love Pills, and it’s for sale! That’s a lot of love. Each Love Pill contains a little love note. So read these pills, don’t eat them! Also, the whole bottle might be too much love for one person… best to share that much love with someone else. Perhaps a loved one?
Next, we found a gift that’s both practical and romantic: the Sense With Sleep Pill. Your days are numbered, boring old alarm clocks. (See what we did there?) There’s a new sleep system in town and its here to monitor your every sense as you snooze serenely in bed. It tracks your sleeping patterns, the environment of your bedroom, even the air quality. Plus, if you’re hoping to take your relationship out of the friend zone, it’s a great excuse to spend the night! Gotta make sure the new gift works, right?
Let’s stay in the bedroom a little while longer, shall we? (Not trying to be naughty here… or are we?). Our next choice of products is the collection of Epic Stuff Pillows. From retro car ads to the many faces of Marilyn Monroe, these pillows add the oomph to any sofa, couch or bed. There’s a design for everyone from sci-fi geeks to pop art lovers. So go ahead, cuddle up and get cozy on the couch this V-Day.
Here’s a fun one. The Beard Bib is a great gift for any dude who loves to leave the bathroom sink awash in millions of tiny discarded stubble hairs. It’s the gift that says, “We appreciate the fact you haven’t gone full-hipster or full-homeless and still trim your beard. We don’t appreciate the mess it leaves behind.” Still love you though!
We love a product that gets straight to the point. When buying Swago Cologne For Men the first question you’ll have to answer is, “What kind of man are you?” Now, don’t get your boxers in a bunch! You can’t go wrong thanks to their drop-down list. (Phew! Not many can handle Valentine’s Day and an existential crisis at once.) Swago has the right scratch n’ sniff scent for all the VIPs, Legends, Gentlemen and Champs out there. And it fits perfectly in your wallet next to that ever-present…um…ID card…for you want to smell juuuust right.
Leave it to the feisty Brazilians to re-invent something as basic as underwear Brazilian Secret is a sexy little present that’s perfect for anyone less endowed in back end, so to speak. Let’s be honest, the girl you buy this for will either love you or hate you. Butt at least if she leaves you, she’ll look good walking away! Sorry, ass-inine jokes aside, this underwear shapes your booty just like a push-up bra. The padded backside lifts and boosts in all the right places. Just think of all the #belfies!
Are you one half of a happy couple? Well, aren’t you smug on Feb. 14? Show the world just how happy you are (and make your single friends groan) by prancing down the street with your better half in matching Epic T-Shirts. Made of 100% cotton, with high quality prints and lots of different designs to choose from, Epic Stuff’s T’s are your own personal billboard to the world, bringing all your PDA dreams to a whole new level. Is your bae ambitious and unabashedly bitchy? There’s a T for that too!
Anyone who loves underwater adventure is in the right place here in Thailand. So give that active, free spirited person in your life the ultimate gift with this Full Face Snorkel Mask. Everything’s about capturing moments (and capturing likes), so obviously it comes complete with a built-in GoPro camera mount. No Whale Shark (or mermaid) sighting will go undocumented ever again.
If that wasn’t enough to get you excited for Valentine’s Day then we suggest scrolling through more of Epic Stuff’s Valentine’s Day gift ideas for even more gift-giving inspiration. And if you need your epic gifts in an epic hurry then you’re in luck. Shipping in Thailand is absolutely free, with 3 hour express delivery in Bangkok. They even offer 14 day returns and you can pay cash on delivery. Bonus: the hilarious product descriptions instructions are just too funny – even forever alones will crack a chuckle!
Subscribe to The Coconuts Podcast for top trending news and pop culture from Southeast Asia and Hong Kong every Friday!